The Relational Paradox: Wanting and Fearing Closeness

Dear Seekers,

We show up to Spoke Circles with two seemingly opposing desires: to connect and to self-protect. Many of us were encouraged to present idealized versions of ourselves in order to be accepted by our families, communities, and oppressors. The relational paradox tells us that we desperately want to be close to others, while simultaneously being petrified of the closeness.